I've been thinking about this season 3 episode a lot lately. It really is one of the most clever. I wish I could tell you exactly which gangster films this episode parodies. All Pete and Pete episodes tends to follow common movie and TV tropes in an ironic and clever way, kind of like The Simpsons, but the references aren't as on-the-nose. In this case, lets agree that this follows the journey of a protagonist who has pissed off their enemy, and that enemy is systematically plotting and offing all innocent bystanders to get closer to his prey. Pinned! is equal parts Wiley Coyote, Good Fellas, and teen sports drama.
Once again Big Pete is doing what he can to socially climb, as he's painted to be at the bottom of the totem pole this entire series. This time, Pete is striving to get a letterman jacket so he can have social cashe and so girls will pay attention to him. It's the "power of the mighty W."
Pete has to have it. He's not athletic, Pete doesn't have any aspirations. "Just pick a sport and make the team." As usual he wants the easy way out, and we know this attitude will bite him later.
But Pete finds that getting what he wants is "as simple as falling off a building."
Pinned!
S3 E10 - Air Date: December 7, 1996
Pete is excited to join the wrestling team, with his friend Teddy - who had already made a comfortable situation for himself there. As usual Pete is not into producing the effort it takes to be good at the thing he's working on. The wrestling coach, Beano Glatner, is an old school hard ass. His archetype is like that of a boxing coach from the 50's. As expected, he is not easy on Pete, and is generally intimidating.
Pete struggles during practice, even with the wrestling dummy, Roy. Ellen, who is at the practice - for whatever reason - shows Pete how to do the "Reverse Wildiggy."
The already intensely accomplished Ellen, can add wrestling to her repertoire. Wrestling is in her blood. As old-timey footage of a man alligator wrestling plays on, Pete explains that Ellen's uncle, Gentleman Bill Hickle, was the Greater Pensacola wrestling champion. He passed everything he knew to her, and she was enthusiastic to help the team.
The way Pete and Pete was formatted, there were some facts about the characters that were maintained throughout the series, such as their mother's metal plate in her head. But in each episode things like Ellen's life long passion for wrestling is only revealed in this third season episode and is never mentioned again. Though this isn't a plot hole or a negative. The MO of many characters in the show was to have stalwart dedication to something that is appropriate for the episode and helps the plot along. It fits and it works with the show's quirkiness without being insulting to the audience.
As Ellen interjects herself into the Boys Wrestling team practices, Mr. Glatner is visibly threatened by her knowledge of the game. She's being a little bit of a pain in the ass, undermining Glatner, but he's also not being encouraging to her interests. Being the sexist you expect a wrestling coach to be, Glatner dismisses Ellen and tells her if she wants to help the team, she should join the cheer leading squad. Ellen has something brewing beneath the surface. Oh, she'll join the cheer leading squad...
Upon seeing the lineup, Pete is disappointed he's only made the 4th string. Teddy reminds him that you still get a letter just for coming to every practice. You don't have to be the best to get one, you can just coast by. Pete is relieved, but just as he lets his guard down, Endless Mike enters the locker room.
"What does that W stand for? Wuss Bucket?!" Mike has always had it out for Pete, and now that Pete's found a team to belong to - or a group of jocks to attach himself to - Mike wants to tear this down immediately.
In a sweet turn of events, Pete's beefy teammates come to his side. For once Pete isn't defenseless against Mike. Pete stands his ground and tells him off.
Endless Mike calls them a bunch of clowns.
"I have a nice shag stapled to the roof of my van, you think I could be a jock-o too?" He sarcastically coos.
Pete's new social security only makes Mike more likely to retaliate, and harder. He threatens,
"When I get you alone i'm gonna yank [your spine] out of your body and beat you over the head with it!"
At this time Pete is not phased by Mike's threats. Pete is protected and his letter is in the bag. So Pete coasts through the practices, he's sitting pretty.
Meanwhile, Ellen calls Glatener's bluff and joins the Pep Squad. She is once again present at every wrestling practice. Ellen is so full of pep! She's at least faking it to grind Glatner's gears.
Pete is happy to hear that Endless Mike transferred to Sludgely High. Wow, no more Endless Mike right? Well, Mike went ahead and joined the Sludgely wrestling team. Now Mike can theoretically be matched against Pete.
But Pete isn't too worried. He's all the way down at 4th string. He would never be called to wrestle in a match. No problem... until the 1st string wrestler is taken out in a freak accident. There's an unexplained explosion, and the poor kid has smoking coming out of his wrestling headgear.
Endless Mike ads some kind of device to the hand dryer in the locker room. Frank is unaware as he walks away from the sink and the hand dryer starts on it's own. Somehow this device causes the hand dryer to suck Frank inside it. He's dragged across the floor, and the last image we have of him are his hands flailing out of the machine. If he's not dead, Frank needs the hospital, and therefore cannot wrestle.
Carl VanDike is the last in line above Pete now. Little Pete is tasked with keeping him alive.
In a very mob movie story line, Little Pete brings Carl to a sleazy motel and is coaching him through a witness protection program scenario. Little Pete has three rules: sleep with your shoes on, no eating unless I taste it first, only use code names.
"My code name is Schecky."
As Carl tries to bite into an apple, Little Pete slaps it out of his hand and says, "Ask yourself: do I want to live or do I want to DIE?"
"Live! Live! I want to live!"
Carl inspects his surroundings. "It's not so bad," he reasons. Carl muses that he has cable tv, fine art, and an Amazing Fingers Vibrating Bed.
Little Pete immediately knows this sounds fishy. But before he can stop Carl from putting in the quarter, the bed slams up into the wall, presumably crushing him.
"Curse you Endless Mike!!! Aaahhh!!!"
Mike was disguised as a cleaning lady, the ingenious way he infiltrated the motel room.
Now that Pete is in the 1st string, he's considering giving up the letter. But Teddy has another idea. Change your weight class. Right now, he's in the 130-139lb weight range. If Pete becomes lighter than Mike, they can't be matched. "Loose a few pounds, gain a life."
Endless Mike is craftier than Pete and Teddy give him credit for. He's ruthless. With Pete attempting to loose weight, Mike was right behind him.
Pete wasn't safe in the sauna...
His diets weren't extreme enough...
And where Pete was ok with loosing some body hair, Mike was removing organs.
"Say hello to my kidney, 3lb 4oz."
At the weigh in, Pete is 129 lbs and Mike is 130. Pete thinks he's in the clear.
Mike extracts one of his molars right on the spot, and he drops to 129lbs 15oz. Pete and Mike will be wrestling against each other.
Mike says, "They say the human body has 191 separate bones. Oh where do I begin?"
At this point Pete is contemplating quitting the team to avoid the physical punishment of and Endless Mike scorned. Pete postulates, "Quitters never get their guts pulverized in front of the whole school."
Ellen and Pete lament their situation. "I've forgotten more about wrestling than he ever new." she says.
That's when it dawns of them. Pete has tried everything except trying to actually beat Mike in the ring. Ellen offers to teach Pete everything she knows, so he has to tools to defeat Endless Mike.
Teddy helps by role playing as Endless Mike. He gets fully into character.
Teddy was kicking Pete's ass, but around dawn Ellen's coaching began to kick in. Pete was as ready as he could be for this match.
On game day, Mike comes out with a pro wrestling theme song and stage lighting, full skeletal make up, cape, zebra stripped pants - it's an homage to WWF (and it was WWF and not WWE at the time this aired).
His tag line: "I am the Dr. Of Death, and I am here to cure you of your life."
Glatner approaches Ellen as the match starts. "You even think about coaching and your keester will be suspended for the rest of the semester."
In the beginning, Pete is struggling.
But Ellen comes up with a cheer that will inform Pete of the moves he needs to make. Pete just has to execute them correctly...
"Wrist lock left! Ankle block right! Turn the blades and fight fight fight!"
It works!
At this point, Glatner escalates things quickly and calls the police in. They remove Ellen from the game. Ellen doesn't go to jail though, she's given an immediate sentencing of 6 months suspension.
Pete watches her being taken away, and he's not sure if he can complete the match without her.
"But... I'm gonna die."
Teddy yells from the sideline, "The big W is yours! Why don't you throw in the towel?" Teddy was right, Pete would get the bare minimum of what he set out for, a purely symbolic symbol of social prowess, a "six inch piece of low pile carpet."
"It was all that mattered, and then I realized it wasn't about the letter anymore."
Pete is tired of running from Mike, and he wants to win. As he continues to put Pete in peril, Mike spouts these gems:
"It's time for the doctor to sign your death warrant, flame head."
"Just accept it Wrigley, death is just another part of life."
Like all Cinderella stories, Pete comes back with a vengeance. Pete bests Mike, and Glatner exclaims, "Where did he learn that move!?" Teddy says, "His coach... that cheerleader you just kicked out."
Pete wins. Everyone rejoices.
Pete narrates, "From that day on W would never stand for "wimp", or "wuss-bucket", it would stand for "winner", and I guess no one needs a letter for that."
Pete never shows off his jacket again in the remaining 3 episodes of the season and series. Endless Mike shows up in the final episode, Saturday. So despite the transfer to Sludgley High School, he's got the weekends to be a fixture in Wellsville.
I liked this episode for it's over-exaggerated drama, and smart use of film tropes. I find myself constantly chuckling during this one, and marveling at the acting skills of these young people. It makes me want to take a time machine and get a job working on this show!
I swear I'm going to do another couple of these posts soon. I've been spending a lot of time on Endless Mike, who is the best bully of the show, but he's not the only bully. Stay tuned for my next bully-centric episode review...
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