They say it's not about the destination, it's about the journey. The exact starting point of the Wrigley's yearly road trip to the Hoover Dam is not exactly clear. The Adventures of Pete and Pete was filmed mostly in northern New Jersey, and it's possible their home town of Wellsville is a fictionalized version of Wellsville, NY. The license plates on the show boast "The Sideburn State." Manly.
If they are from Wellsville, NY, the trip to Nevada would be a 35 hour drive.
You might wonder why not just take a five hour flight, time is money after all. But Don Wrigley has a passion for the road. He appreciates the time spent bonding with his family, and he has pride in his ability to navigate - nay - tame the open highway. He is, "King of the Road."
S1E1 - Air date: November 28, 1993
"King of the Road" is the first episode of the official first season of The Adventures of Pete and Pete. An episode like this is a good introduction to the universe of the show. It establishes the family dynamic, the personalities and drives of each character, and the general feel of the setting. What better way to accomplish this than setting this episode in a car driving across the country?
Big Pete narrates that his family takes a yearly trip to the Hoover Dam every year. His father, Don looks forward to it like a tribal ritual. It's a time to "learn what it means to be a family." Pete even suggests that Don becomes something more extraordinary on this pilgrimage. He has regular "dad powers" the rest of the time, but for the two weeks in the station wagon, Don was the King of the Road.
What made him king was paying attention to the three major dad driving categories:
1) Never asking for directions, no matter what.
2) Roof stack packing.
3) Making good time on the road.
Don even got a vanity plate to solidify the title, but the best the DMV could do was "King O Frod." During this trip, Don would have to defend his crown.
The episode kicks off with typical Pete and Pete oddness as Little Pete holds a harmonica out of the window, inexplicably causing it to play a song. Meanwhile, Joyce (aka Mom, played by Judy Grafe) is trying to enhance the signal of their local radio station with the metal plate in her head. Big Pete says that losing those stations, even with Mom's help, is a sign they were on their way to vacation.
The trip starts off pleasantly. Don and Little Pete jeer at passing drivers with bad roof stacks. Little Pete is definitely more excited about the trip than Big Pete. He is enthusiastic about rallying behind his dad, and is positive about his dad's goals to be the best on the road. Big Pete has seen enough. At this point as a teenager he would rather not be stuck in the car with his family. Joyce wants to keep the peace. She supports Don, but reminds everyone to chill out with the "healthy competition" when it gets too rude, especially if Little Pete is involved. But Little Pete has the best insults at his disposal, you can't stifle a genius.
Big Pete notes his father's love of the Hoover Dam as an example of man's ability to tame nature. He says that in a way Don thinks of fatherhood as an attempt to tame nature. This is difficult when you have a young son who is a wiz with electronics like Little Pete. He's made his own device to override the window controls.
I feel like Little Pete's ingenuity is not acknowledged enough as a major aspect to his personality. He is really smart if he comes up with these by himself. Maybe it's because it was the 1990's and the internet wasn't much of a thing yet, but electricity and electronics play a large role in this series. Little Pete operates his own radio station, and he's often in possession of some bizarre and useful device that seems custom made. In this episode we also hear at length about the majesty of the Hoover Dam's hydro electric power. Don poetically describes hydroelectric power as sounding like a song. That exemplifies another aspect of the show, being almost romantically passionate about something otherwise mundane.
Throughout the episode we see the car trip pastimes of the Wrigleys, such as Road Kill Auto Bingo. Something that Joyce finds revolting, but Don encourages, because as Big Pete explains,
"Dad says sacrificing your life on the open road is the highest honor a lower life form can receive."
Don is sitting pretty with his elbow out the window. Big Pete explains it's scientifically proven that the amount of elbow a dad has out the window is directly proportional to how full of himself he is.
The episode has established enough hubris to officially begin this Greek tragedy.
Considering the family is way a head of schedule, Don is going to let them out of the car - a rare occurrence. As they're enjoying Sloppy Joe's and potato chips, Don continues to boast about his prowess on the road. He even thinks someone might recognize him at the pit stop, because of course word gets around on the road about who's the best.
Then Don spies a station wagon pull up next to his...
It's like his car's evil twin. It has a perfect roof stack, and the driver is your quintessential perfect dad (Mr. Perfect is played by Geoff Pierson). He even has a perfect family, with a perfect wife and perfect daughters - pipe and all.
Don is threatened, but Big Pete is finally about to enjoy himself on this trip.
Big Pete is instantly head over heels for this nameless girl, which will be a theme for his character through many episodes of the show. The "Younger Perfect Daughter" (as stated on IMDB) says hello to Little Pete, trying to imply that the boys would couple off with the girls, but Little Pete's unflinching non-reaction shows that he's is more attuned to the tension of competition between the families, and also more concerned with loyalty.
Don is rattled. Mr. Perfect has the "KING OF ROAD" plate he couldn't get from the DMV.
Big Pete approaches the Perfect family's table, which is somehow an even nicer umbrella-covered, gingham-clothed table. Dumbstruck, Pete has a big Sloppy Joe stain on his shirt. Older Perfect Daughter (played by Jaclyn Thornberg -though she is a dead ringer for Selma Blair who is featured as a Big Pete love interest in Season 3!) is kind enough to offer him a pre-moistened wet nap.
They hit it off and go for a stroll. She goes on to tell him that she loves going on long road trips because "The rhythm of the road is like a song of desire." She is very deep and honestly doesn't need to impress him this much.
Meanwhile, Don is trying to round up the family in the middle of their lunch to get back on the road and be as far ahead of these people as possible.
Mr. Perfect is calmly eating corn on the cob and asks knowingly, "Making good time on your excursion?" Don stammers about getting back on the road.
Then he angrily takes the action figure of Captain Zornan off the hood ornament as Little Pete protests - as if it wasn't already there this whole time. This is the kind of thing Little Pete absolutely hates; not accepting his weirdness and quirks, especially if it's a family member against him. We would see more extreme version of this in later episodes mostly with story lines of Big Pete disappointing Little Pete.
As Don continuously honks the horn to get his attention, Big Pete continues to stroll with Older Perfect Daughter. She reveals that her family is also on the way to the Hoover Dam. She says she loves dams, and Big Pete tries to impress her with one of Don's lines about taming nature. She seductively retorts, "well you know, not all nature can be tamed." Big Pete is a bit floored. He leaves with the promise that they might meet again next to a turbine.
Pete is on cloud nine, and approaches the car excitedly stating that the Perfect family is going to the dam too, causing Don to floor it, practically leaving Big Pete behind.
The mood has shifted. Don's elbow is barely out of the window. Joyce is so upset she can't fold the map. Little Pete is drying out his tongue in protest.
Side note: All of the opening credit shots for the main family members in Season 1 are from this episode. Little Pete's clips are always true to his personality, so this tongue out the window thing is perfect.
Big Pete has fallen hard for this girl, and he writes love poems for her in the dust on the car. Big Pete narrates that he and his friend Ellen, who we know from the Nickelodeon shorts and the previous half hour specials, had decided to just remain friends (though it's a will-they-wont-they situation for the rest of the series). Pete is happy to have found someone new who "sent my heart spinning like a broken compass"
Another wrench is thrown in Don's plans when he turns on the windshield wipers and it inspires Little Pete to ask for another pit stop. Don doesn't want to stop and tries to encourage him to hold it because "Wrigleys know how to hold their water!" But Joyce is the voice of reason and insists they stop. Don pulls over and they do their business. In an appropriately visceral shot / sight gag, Don pours his coffee on the ground and yells for everyone to finish.
Joyce is taking the longest because she always "has to find the perfect spot."
She is shown frolicking in a field a la The Sound of Music. It starts to get dark and she's not back yet. Don shoots a flair for her and she finally gets back in the car.
As Don drives well into the night to make up for lost time, Big Pete stays awake thinking about her, and the mysteries of the road, like why is there always only one boot on the side of highway? and what are those green signs trying to tell us?
As "Everywhere" by Polaris plays - presumably on the radio - Pete laments about when you miss someone so much the saddest song always plays on the radio. This is a really good heartbreaking song for this scene.
The morning breaks with Joyce receiving a police radio signal talking about a "10-9er." Joyce wants to pull over and help, but Don is not having it. Then we see dramatic shots of what at code "10-9er" is: a garage door gone haywire.
As the report comes over the radio, we see Little Pete has his own garage door opener, knowingly causing the mayhem as they drive by.
Joyce has had enough of Don's imaginary competition. She says, "I'm ashamed of you!" Joyce has tried to be supportive but now she tears him apart, trying to expose Don's ideas as paranoid. She digs into Don, saying she thinks Mr. Perfect would pull over if someone needed help.
The family is unraveling. Don has lost control. He asks who wants to join the other family, which gets a unanimous vote of yes. Then Don says, "Go ahead, they're right behind us."
Like a perfect harmonious family, the Perfects are singing Row Your Boat in rounds, and then they sing it all again in French. They pass Don on the left, which means they're going 70 mph to Don's 55 mph. Mr. Perfect just broke the law by breaking the speed limit, and Don wont stoop to his level. As he rants, he asks Big Pete what he thinks. Pete swoons from his latest encounter with Older Perfect Daughter, parroting back from the song, "life is but a dream..."
Don calls Big Pete and traitor and makes him stay in the way back or the open trunk area of the car - something that would be pretty illegal now, since there's no seat belt back there. Little Pete encourages Don to speed, "Let's dust him dad, come on crank it!" But Don insists he drives clean, and will beat them the Wrigley way. This means short cuts that get them completely lost. He wont break rule number one: no asking for directions - ever, to succeed at number three: making good time. Joyce begs him to ask, and even screams out of the car at passers by, only to have Don roll up the window on her.
Then Don hears the sound of electricity in the air, the song of the dam, and he knows they're close. These series of shots and electrical noises reminded me of some David Lynch vibes.
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| The Adventures of Pete and Pete |
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| Fire Walk With Me |
The Wrigleys have their second wind and are back on the road. Dad even has his elbow out of the window once again. But just as they think they have a leg up, the Perfects are back on their tail.
Joyce is officially shook. "What does he want from us??" Now she knows that Don was not imagining the competition.
Without breaking her Stepford Wife smile, Mrs. Perfect takes the wheel as Mr. Perfect climbs out of the window to start a roof stacking competition.
Joyce knows it's on. She tells Don, "Take him down Don. Take him down HARD." Big-band chase scene music queues, and the competition is in full swing.
Don and Mr. Perfect stack to perilous heights. Mr. Perfect doesn't say a word and smiles like a creep the whole time. Both families toss objects to their respective fathers for stacking. The floor of each car is telling of the personalities of the families. The Perfects have an immaculate carpet with items like dictionaries and spring water bottles.
The Wrigleys have a wrinkled carpet with potato chips and food mashed into it, and Captain Zornan.
Finally Captain Zornan is added to the very top of the stack, only to be outdone by a slightly taller decorative Asian figurine. The Perfects are so cultured.
Don accepts his defeat. The perfect dad was just too perfect.
Joyce consoles Don. Considering how crazy he was getting, losing didn't seem to get to him that much. He was taking it like a champ.
But then Big Pete noticed something. "I looked in dad's eyes and saw a man who gave all he had, not for just himself but for all of us. And I knew what it was like to be a family."
Big Pete takes a moment to look at Older Perfect Daughter one last time. "I knew I would never see her again, but I would never forget her face."
After mouthing "I'm sorry." to her, Big Pete starts removing his clothes. Don is confused at first, but Big Pete explains to his father, "We aren't perfect dad, we''re just... us."
Little Pete shouts, "We're mutants!" and starts taking his clothes off too.
Don is energized and knows exactly what Big Pete is getting at. "You're right, we're Wrigleys!" The whole family removed all their clothes to make their stack just that much higher and win the roof stacking competition.
As a prize, Don got to trade his license plate for Mr. Perfect's (that's not how license plates work, but it's just a show). Now Don has the proof that he's King of Road.
Big Pete notes that Mr. Perfect couldn't even look Don in the face when he won, but that could be due to the fact they were all buck naked.
Since this is a kids show, the above image is the shot that implied their nudity. Victorious and walking away as a stronger family unit, the Wrigleys end the episode with their elbows confidently jutting out of the station wagon. They can say that they won fairly, and they did it their way, as a family.
Like I said earlier, this episode is a perfect first episode to express how the family dynamic works and also how the individual characters are motivated. We see Don's sense of justice, competitiveness coupled with insecurity, and love of being a father. We see Joyce's kindness, and resourcefulness with her metal plate. We see Little Pete's oddball nature, with his gadgets, love of chaos, disdain for bland normality, and fierce loyalty. We see Big Pete's sentimentality, his desire for perfection and acceptance, but also his ability to come back to family and accepting the idea of being yourself.
I hope this summer, if you're traveling with your family or not, that you all have lasting memories on the road...
Next time, I will talk about an episode that I have mixed feelings about, but has been a creative inspiration to me....
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